Stoof
09-10-2008, 02:42 PM
http://i92.photobucket.com/albums/l3/Stoofspur/stoof2.jpg
banner by the terrifyingly good chrissivad
You know you make me wanna (Shout!)
Kick my heels up and (Shout!)
Yell at Ramos and (Shout!)
Take my tickets back and (Shout!)
I have managed to go 4 days now without seeing any evidence of our display on Sunday. I was away for the weekend, attacking Sherwood Forest Center Parcs with 7 of my lad-iest lads, and I am now going to attempt to do something quite odd … and that's give you a Stoof Shout Match Report without having seen the game.
Obviously I know that we hit the bar a couple of times, and I know it was a rocket of a free-kick – no images and no other match reports have graced me, except the odd smidgen of information from player interviews and Spurs Mobile's ever-generous line-up and substitution texts.
So, here we go. Let's see how well I do, feel free to mark me out of 10 for your general enjoyment of this read.
Duel Of The Fates sounded as the players walked out (you see, I thought I'd go safe with that) and yet again Mr. King was not involved after his mid-week Faces … I mean … mid-week footballing endeavours in Europe. The crowd rose, hoping that they could finally get their shouty moment to relieve themselves of their Armageddon-like visions of Spurs in the Championship, amid a world of but one Super Nationalised World Bank where unemployment was in 10s of millions and people stock-piled cash high under their mattresses. Worryingly enough, as they cheered each player as his name was read out, all of those things could be less than 9 months away.
Spurs started brightly in the opening 5 minutes, Zokora was passing sideways and backwards as is his way and Pavlyuchenko and Campbell were making some nice runs although without much avail. All of a sudden,a foul by Zokora/Jenas/Gunter/Woodgate (or a combination of the four) caused the referee (Rob Styles wasn't it?) to make a horrific decision and award Hull a free-kick.
Geovanni then closed his eyes and ran up to the ball in hope and luckily made a perfect connection and it only just beat Gomes by a few 10s of metres and Hull were luckily in front with luck.
The crowd moaned in frustration, a faint strain of Martin Jol songs could be heard dotted around the ground and we had it all to do.
From then on I expect we created a handful of chances – not a hatful – but some. Didn't we? Please? I mean, it's Hull after all. Yes, they beat Arsenal but their keeper was in inspired form and the Woolwich Wanderers were wasteful – so we must have had chances aside from Bale's effort (was it a freekick?) that hit the bar and Woodgate's effort (header from a corner?) that also rattled woodwork. So I would have thought Fraizer Campbell hit a couple of shots a couple of yards wide? Bent having one guilt-edge chance but just missing? Pavlyuchenko with a header. That's what I'm thinking, a Pav header that goes straight at the keeper? Jenas making a run through everyone and then either misplacing his shot or his pass? Zokora running through 4 men and then tumbling by the 5th and getting a dubious free-kick?
My whole point in this, if you were struggling to see one, (and frankly I don't blame you), is that I'm pretty sure I've got a lot of that right. And that's because going to Tottenham for the last year or so (as I have done, missing maybe 6 games) became ever so predictable, almost to the point of being able to write the headlines before a ball has been kicked in anger with even some of the detail. I bet we should have had a penalty too?
That fact (if true) is a worrying sign. Maybe we're not just getting that slice of luck – at Portsmouth, our penalty (which was a penalty) would have been a potential equaliser and who knows what it would have done for our confidence? Whether Ramos has suddenly become a clueless Spanish muddle of a man is debatable, a debate which I expect is raging on across messageboards of all types (mainly, having the heading "Sack Ramos?!?!" I would have thought). I don't think he has become clueless, but more worryingly I'm not sure the players have been in this position before: rock bottom; 2 points (one of those amazingly gained away at Chelsea!) after 7 games. I'm not suggesting we need Nigel "I'll take 'em down" Quashie just yet – but where optimism and positivity once flowed ever so easily with our new players/new coaching set-up/new sexy black kit, it's rapidly being replaced with "what if" fears of relegation and work colleague mockery.
I jokingly said to one of the lads, "here, well, at least if we go down the tickets will be cheaper". A West Ham fan replied, "yeah, not with Levy in charge mate". His point was well taken. Unlike ours should have been (at the very least) against Hull, at home.
***
One member of this forum posted lines from the immortal AllyGold's book "Ode to Jol" and it sent tingles down my spine. This book (if you haven't read it) was written after gloriously failing to beat West Ham on the last day of the season – LasagnaGate - and reflected on our entire season, and dared to dream that our corner had been turned and that the shackles were lifted from our underachieving necks. It was all in place, and everyone was pulling in the right direction.
I try to be positive, I really do. And I can see us being OK. But it's not the being OK that I want, maybe I just want a cuddly manager who made me laugh, who I spent hours trying to impersonate, who dared me to dream of a Tottenham Hotspur who could challenge. It's a pointless position to put yourself in really, and we'd do well to realise that Martin Jol is but Tottenham past. We stand in Tottenham present with Juande Ramos, looking to Tottenham future. But at the moment, even with the rosiest of rosies on, it's just a bit mleh.
***
Apologies for the detour away from the Match Report – but as words were typed, it became evident I couldn't successfully replicate an entire 90 minutes or even a highlights package that would be entertaining enough. So I gave you some miserableness to get your teeth in to.
Until next time, Shouters.
banner by the terrifyingly good chrissivad
You know you make me wanna (Shout!)
Kick my heels up and (Shout!)
Yell at Ramos and (Shout!)
Take my tickets back and (Shout!)
I have managed to go 4 days now without seeing any evidence of our display on Sunday. I was away for the weekend, attacking Sherwood Forest Center Parcs with 7 of my lad-iest lads, and I am now going to attempt to do something quite odd … and that's give you a Stoof Shout Match Report without having seen the game.
Obviously I know that we hit the bar a couple of times, and I know it was a rocket of a free-kick – no images and no other match reports have graced me, except the odd smidgen of information from player interviews and Spurs Mobile's ever-generous line-up and substitution texts.
So, here we go. Let's see how well I do, feel free to mark me out of 10 for your general enjoyment of this read.
Duel Of The Fates sounded as the players walked out (you see, I thought I'd go safe with that) and yet again Mr. King was not involved after his mid-week Faces … I mean … mid-week footballing endeavours in Europe. The crowd rose, hoping that they could finally get their shouty moment to relieve themselves of their Armageddon-like visions of Spurs in the Championship, amid a world of but one Super Nationalised World Bank where unemployment was in 10s of millions and people stock-piled cash high under their mattresses. Worryingly enough, as they cheered each player as his name was read out, all of those things could be less than 9 months away.
Spurs started brightly in the opening 5 minutes, Zokora was passing sideways and backwards as is his way and Pavlyuchenko and Campbell were making some nice runs although without much avail. All of a sudden,a foul by Zokora/Jenas/Gunter/Woodgate (or a combination of the four) caused the referee (Rob Styles wasn't it?) to make a horrific decision and award Hull a free-kick.
Geovanni then closed his eyes and ran up to the ball in hope and luckily made a perfect connection and it only just beat Gomes by a few 10s of metres and Hull were luckily in front with luck.
The crowd moaned in frustration, a faint strain of Martin Jol songs could be heard dotted around the ground and we had it all to do.
From then on I expect we created a handful of chances – not a hatful – but some. Didn't we? Please? I mean, it's Hull after all. Yes, they beat Arsenal but their keeper was in inspired form and the Woolwich Wanderers were wasteful – so we must have had chances aside from Bale's effort (was it a freekick?) that hit the bar and Woodgate's effort (header from a corner?) that also rattled woodwork. So I would have thought Fraizer Campbell hit a couple of shots a couple of yards wide? Bent having one guilt-edge chance but just missing? Pavlyuchenko with a header. That's what I'm thinking, a Pav header that goes straight at the keeper? Jenas making a run through everyone and then either misplacing his shot or his pass? Zokora running through 4 men and then tumbling by the 5th and getting a dubious free-kick?
My whole point in this, if you were struggling to see one, (and frankly I don't blame you), is that I'm pretty sure I've got a lot of that right. And that's because going to Tottenham for the last year or so (as I have done, missing maybe 6 games) became ever so predictable, almost to the point of being able to write the headlines before a ball has been kicked in anger with even some of the detail. I bet we should have had a penalty too?
That fact (if true) is a worrying sign. Maybe we're not just getting that slice of luck – at Portsmouth, our penalty (which was a penalty) would have been a potential equaliser and who knows what it would have done for our confidence? Whether Ramos has suddenly become a clueless Spanish muddle of a man is debatable, a debate which I expect is raging on across messageboards of all types (mainly, having the heading "Sack Ramos?!?!" I would have thought). I don't think he has become clueless, but more worryingly I'm not sure the players have been in this position before: rock bottom; 2 points (one of those amazingly gained away at Chelsea!) after 7 games. I'm not suggesting we need Nigel "I'll take 'em down" Quashie just yet – but where optimism and positivity once flowed ever so easily with our new players/new coaching set-up/new sexy black kit, it's rapidly being replaced with "what if" fears of relegation and work colleague mockery.
I jokingly said to one of the lads, "here, well, at least if we go down the tickets will be cheaper". A West Ham fan replied, "yeah, not with Levy in charge mate". His point was well taken. Unlike ours should have been (at the very least) against Hull, at home.
***
One member of this forum posted lines from the immortal AllyGold's book "Ode to Jol" and it sent tingles down my spine. This book (if you haven't read it) was written after gloriously failing to beat West Ham on the last day of the season – LasagnaGate - and reflected on our entire season, and dared to dream that our corner had been turned and that the shackles were lifted from our underachieving necks. It was all in place, and everyone was pulling in the right direction.
I try to be positive, I really do. And I can see us being OK. But it's not the being OK that I want, maybe I just want a cuddly manager who made me laugh, who I spent hours trying to impersonate, who dared me to dream of a Tottenham Hotspur who could challenge. It's a pointless position to put yourself in really, and we'd do well to realise that Martin Jol is but Tottenham past. We stand in Tottenham present with Juande Ramos, looking to Tottenham future. But at the moment, even with the rosiest of rosies on, it's just a bit mleh.
***
Apologies for the detour away from the Match Report – but as words were typed, it became evident I couldn't successfully replicate an entire 90 minutes or even a highlights package that would be entertaining enough. So I gave you some miserableness to get your teeth in to.
Until next time, Shouters.