20 Signs the Transfer Window is Ruining Your Life

Discussion in 'Columns' started by E.L.Strict, Jul 22, 2013.

  • by E.L.Strict, Jul 22, 2013 at 9:56 AM
  • E.L.Strict

    E.L.Strict Cerebral Houdini Staff

    Messages:
    5,638
    Media:
    20
    Albums:
    2
    Ratings Received:
    +1,513 / 30 / -2
    [​IMG]
    20 Signs the Transfer Window is Ruining Your Life


    1. You try to offer women a “first option” on your company.

    2. You only buy drinks during happy hour and last orders.

    3. You refuse to become excited about anything unless it is relayed to you via a yellow, scrolling breaking news bar.

    4. You begin to moot things.

    5. You would never hire a cleaner because they can’t seem to keep secrets.

    6. A gorgeous woman breaks up with her boyfriend and declares that she wants to date you. You ask her out and are her only suitor, so she and her ex buy a house together.

    7. You won’t get into bed without first taking a picture of yourself holding up your pyjamas.

    8. You’re in an awful mood because the ITKs only had bad news.

    9. You wish that you could reload the pages of your newspaper.

    10. You ignore the fact you have read it before and that it wasn’t true the first time.

    11. You have dreams in which rival teams sign all the best players and then wake up relieved and in a good mood.

    12. You misinterpret a cryptic ITK clue and become convinced that you are about to sign for Spurs

    13. You “understand” everything, but are always wrong.

    14. You ignore the fact you have read it before and that it wasn’t true the first time.

    15. You believe that the transfer window shouldn’t be “slammed shut” so late at night.

    16. For your anniversary, you call your girlfriend to a press conference and pledge that you have been given a huge war chest to spend on two or three top quality presents.

    17. You can recall the names of at least 3 football agents.

    18. You rename Sunday “Weekend Deadline Day.”

    19. Your dog refuses to be taken for a walk. Sources close to the dog claim that it has been tapped up by Manchester United.

    20. You would consider an offer of a list of 19 things as “derisory,” but settle for 20.
     
    • Funny Funny x 7
    • Like Like x 4
    • Winner Winner x 2
    • Creative Creative x 2
  • Categories: Uncategorized

Comments

Discussion in 'Columns' started by E.L.Strict, Jul 22, 2013.

  1. WiganSpur
    7. You won’t get into bed without first taking a picture of yourself holding up your pyjamas. :ROFLMAO:
    • Like Like x 1
    • Agree Agree x 1
  2. Armstrong_11
    21. The first thing u do when u wake up is to check your iPad/laptop to see if we have announcement any new signings.

    22. Your girlfriend/wife thinks that you are having a seeing another girl due to the fact that u are constantly checking your phone and looking disappointed at no new ITKs are found.
    • Like Like x 2
    • Agree Agree x 1
  3. pundits folly
    My routine goes
    1. Wake up.
    2. BBC Gossip just to get the lie of the land.
    3. SpursCommunity for the latest headlines.
    4. Newsnow (spurs feed already on my homepage obviously) in case anything happened in the last 10 minutes.

    Trying to ration myself to three checks a day (at meal times) now, though today has seen a relapse.
  4. klacey
    10 and 14 had me going then. lol
  5. wosH
    3. You refuse to become excited about anything unless it is relayed to you via a yellow, scrolling breaking news bar.

    Oh, stop this already!
  6. Armstrong_11
    3 times a day???? I check atleast 15. Haha! :)
  7. Stevespurs71
    Nice one centurion!!
  8. spud
    :ROFLMAO:

Share This Page