Can You Ever Stop Being a Spurs Fan?

Discussion in 'Columns' started by Thesoccershrink, Sep 2, 2014.

  • by Thesoccershrink, Sep 2, 2014 at 8:46 PM
  • Thesoccershrink

    Thesoccershrink Member

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    Yesterday, there was a post from greaves4fr expressing complete frustration with our chairman, which led him to decide to stop supporting Spurs. But can you ever stop supporting Spurs? I mean can you really stop? Not sneak a peak at the scores, or the table or wonder what your former buddies at WHL and on this forum are doing? OK, so if you're twelve years old and decide another team is cooler and sexier, I guess you can switch allegiance. But what if you have 20, 30, 40 or 50 years invested in following one team. Can you really give it up?

    First, supporting a team is part of your identity. Not only have you expended an extraordinary amount of your time, effort and money in following Spurs, you have done so very publicly -- the flag on your car, the banner outside your house, the T-shirts, not to mention your social circle, the members of which are either staunchly aligned in the same brotherhood or against you.

    Second, your history is inextricably interconnected with the club (and 'club' is an important concept here). You remember vividly where you were when we were relegated, promoted, won the cup, when Harry joined, when Harry left. The magical moments -- and the really terrible ones -- are stored in your memory with a vividness that is unmatched by pretty much anything else in your life. (There's a scientific reason for this to do with the role of emotion in memory storage and consolidation, but that's beyond the scope of this article.)

    Third, supporting a soccer team, like marriage, is a test of your character. Yes, it would be great if life were stress-free and you won all the time, but it isn't and you can't. There are ups and downs, highs and low and to expect otherwise is to believe in Superman and the Tooth Fairy (whom, my ITK tells me, has just signed a deal with Luis Suarez). We know that life is like that and in many ways it is our endurance and our commitment that is the most important part of being a supporter. We show up in the rain, snow, ice, -- even at the sports bar or living room couch, always with hope, sometimes with anxiety, but unfailingly with passion. It's a total commitment unlike any other. It's about as unconditional as a commitment can get. Chairmen come and go, players arrive and leave, results fluctuate. But you're still there.

    I would argue it's easier to change religion and get divorced than it is to give up supporting the team that has been so meaningful to you.

    I have spent a career observing people struggle to change the things in their lives that are really killing them, where there's no logical reason to continue with their actions, indeed where there are immediate compelling reasons why they should give them up -- and they still can't do it. Can you really deny your past? It would take something really dramatic and life-changing to even have a chance -- something like a sex change, disowning your family, or joining the federal witness protection program.

    Giving up supporting Spurs (or any other team) is giving up. Giving up hope, commitment, and passion. Sure, we all get frustrated and think that the easiest way to end the pain is to simply stop. But your frustration is directly proportional to your passion. Giving up is to say you don't want to be so committed because it can be too painful. But what do you have if you don't have passion, hope and commitment? So, when you think of quitting, remember, this isn't about Spurs, it's about you.

    And as a fan you should keep one thing in mind:

    It's not what Spurs have given you, it's what you have given Spurs.

    Can you really stop?
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Discussion in 'Columns' started by Thesoccershrink, Sep 2, 2014.

Could you really stop supporting Spurs?

  1. Yes

  2. No

  3. Not sure

  1. CrazyHeart
    No freaking way! Look, the board's done plenty for me to be pissed about, but my support of Spurs is unwavering, even with a Sherwood or Hoddle in charge.

    You can't just stop supporting your team because you don't like the way things turn out - that to me, speaks of one's character. I couldn't even imagine the shame of telling colleagues, who I watch games with that I no longer support the team I'm pretty much synonymous with in their eyes - just because...

    The guy who said all that stuff in the first place probably supports the club more than ever, he's just venting - albeit unproductively!
  2. Edgarsglasses
    When i was 8 my dad took me to my first game it was Liverpool vs Bayern Munich in 1981 and i stood on the Kop in my Hitachi shirt,i was well and truly being groomed into being a Liverpool fan,well nothing strange there as i'm a born n bread scouser.At 8 years old you don't know any better and you go with the flow i guess,which is what every boy in my area did,you were either a Red or a Blue and nothing else!
    I then noticed on tv this long haired footballer with tree trunk legs & shirt flowing outside of his shorts.He was like a magician spraying the ball around and firing in spectacluar goals from everywhere.Yes you guessed it,it was HODDLE! i was hooked.
    It was then that i started to follow Hoddle & Spurs and i ditched the Red kit for the blue & white,my dad very puzzled by all this thought it was a faze and everyone told him i would grow out of it.Well the faze has lasted into my 40's now.The stick in school was immense especially when we were beaten by Liverpool or Everton (and most of the time we were) but eventually people got used it and i was even seen as having balls in following another team,i have been asked all my life how can a scouser support Spurs? and i always say because Glenn Hoddle played for them.

    Spurs were my first love and i even though they frustrate the life out of me at times,i still love the club and can't imagine not following them.I don't know how anyone can support Spurs then just stop like that.I know i couldn't do it even if i tried.

    Unconditional Love COYS!
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  3. Donki
    No way, sorry just sumthing in side me that will never change. Yes priorities may change and time may become precious but I couldn't imagine ever not even sneaking a look at the weekend results. The thought of following another team is simply alien to me, fucking hell I can't Fifa or Football Manager with a different team it's just not the same.....
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  4. slartibartfast
    Edit- like to add, Imo its not losing that everyone has arseache with, it's the poor performances and slow boring to watch football. I mean, I wasn't this pissed off when we were mid table mediocre 10 years ago and didn't mind paying because even if we lost we were entertaining but the last 2 seasons and Sundays performance? ?? Well it's easy to understand why some are asking wtf am I wasting my time and money on?
  5. Kspur
    I'm one of the few that voted yes. My passion for spurs is not what it used to be and, whilst I could not support another team, I can definitely see the attraction of giving football the boot altogether, including spurs.
  6. spud
    Simple answer: No.

    I'll read the article later.
  7. dk-yid
    It's not a choice. Not something that can be switched off.
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  8. Gbspurs
    I think it's possible to fall out of love with football. Don't see that its possible to change club though.
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  9. bigspurs
    I'd be lying if I said I never fancied supporting another side from time to time. Couldn't actually do it though!
  10. midspur
    I've felt like giving up following football due to the way it's being run, but I could never get the goosebumps or that feeling deep in your stomach by supporting another team
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  11. beuller
    Change our colours, call us the Tottenham tigers and move our geographical location significantly and I will give up pretty quickly.

    Otherwise, you are stuck with me I'm afraid.
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  12. Ricky_Yid
    Ive supported them all my life but i really only have vague memories of the 80s as a child the 91 FA Cup final is my first real proper proud spurs moment that i could understand.. Shortly after spurs were shit!! very shit for a very long time.. I Made it through that, this is a doddle... However its very different and frustrating than being just plain shit, being so close and just not going that extra mile to be great is awful.. Only ****s change their team..
  13. 1882andallthat
    I'm in the same position as many. I have followed club and country for over 40 years I am clinging onto the hope of witnessing a repeat of 1960/61 and 1966 in footballing terms before I die because I am not old enough to have witnessed those events. Whilst logic screams at me louder and louder following every season and WC or EC cycle that passes that I may not live to see it I can and will never allow that hope to be completely extinguished.

    What's the point of following football if you cannot dream and experience and eagerly anticipate the highs, lows,false dawns and disappointments that comprise the roller coasters that are Spurs and England.

    Equally what's the point of bandwagon jumping and pinching those experiences by proxy by pathetically parading yourself in a Barcelona, Real Madrid,Man Utd, Chelsea Liverpool Germany or Argentina shirt and claiming some tenuous connection or fake allegiance to them just because they have claimed one of the coveted prizes. Any idiot can do that, because that's following a team like a spoilt child who cannot bear to go without who you desert at the first hint of failure. Cue whinging so called post 90s Man Utd fans ringing up 606 and complaining that it's all gone tits up and it's not fair, get a grip !!!!

    So in answer to the question, can I stop supporting Spurs, in conclusion NO, however bad things get, through thick and thin.

    Chairmen, owners, and players are temporary, some last longer than others, some are remembered more fondly, some attain legend status in the memory, others are instantly forgettable or are a living nightmare and conjure up bad flashbacks but my love of Spurs will never die or leave me and no owner chairmen or set of players can or will ever drum that out of me. So I'm here for the duration and on that note I will sign off this post with the following, COYS !!!!
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  14. kursaal
    "I'm TOTTENHAM 'till I cry. I'm TOTTENHAM 'till I cry.."
  15. bat-chain
    If he stopped he never really started.
  16. felmonger
    Up until I was 9yrs, I lived within walking distance of the lane and used to stand and look at those gates and the front of the stadium.

    Now in my seventies I have fallen out of love with football because it is a rip off for most supporters who pay through the nose so that the clubs can pay stupid money to players and agents. Heaven help any Dad who wants to take his kids to a match!

    However, I am still a Season Ticket holder, together with my son, and we are both very much in love with Spurs and enjoy the rocky ride.

    (BTW What a fun article from Thesoccershrink.)
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  17. davidmatzdorf
    When I saw the headline, my immediate reaction was amazement that anyone would consider it worth replying to the show-offy, self-indulgent load of 'look at me' drama-queen horseshit that the other poster decided to share with us, or rather to splatter all over us, never mind starting a whole new thread to perpetuate this absolute twat's bile-filled bull.

    But TSS has managed to extract an actual issue of importance to discuss (see also: silk purse; sow's ear) from the dross - well done.

    Of course the answer is 'no'. I support Spurs, but a full 30 years after I split up with my former East Anglian girlfriend with whom I first attended matches (which was how I discovered Spurs), I still check the Ipswich results after checking the Premiership. It doesn't go away. Ever. Unless, of course, you're a drama queen show-off who doesn't tell the truth.
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  18. spursLA
    I've been a supporter since 1981 when I watched my first game on TV - the FA Cup Final - with my dad in the middle of the night in the middle of Australia. Giving up Spurs would be giving up a piece of personal history, a piece of my identity and I've never even made it to WHL. I can't imagine what it must be like for those of you who have been going your whole lives. Even if stopped watching games, I'd still be a supporter.
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  19. minesadouble
    Wow, big subject, late at night.

    In short, no you can't ever stop. It's not your choice. It's like being in love. She can leave you. You can split up. But that's because it was time for the relationship to end, for whatever reason. You can bitch and moan and say she got fat, ugly, smelly or expensive.

    But I don't believe a true supporter can walk away. Not in a controlled, 'I am not going to love her any more because I've decided not to' way. As the poster said, it is about emotion. You cannot control emotion.

    When spurs lose, I avoid SC, match of the day, talksport, newspapers, radio 5, etc. That's how I get a temporary grip on my emotions and get on with real life. It's like not ringing a girl for a few days because you're pissed with her. But fall out of love? Naaah. As the song says, I'm Tottenham until I die. Whatever happens.
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  20. HobokenSpur
    Never. Ever. It would be like the death of a favourite grandparent. Wonderful memories that I'll never get back again and having a constant longing for those halcyon times.

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