- Feb 1, 2005
- 55,659
- 205,658
- Admin
- #1
It is widely believed that the very first ITK was a man known as Judas Iscariot, who, as their handbook would have you believe, bubbled up Jesus by identifying him with a kiss. Modern day ITK's might well like to remember that Judas didn't come to a happy end.
After this ITK developed through the ages. In Roman times, ITK was given by public announcers in market squares, a tradition which continued for hundred of years. In fact King Richard IV once received some ITK famously proclaimed 'I Like not this message' and promptly had the poor Herald who brought the message shot by bow and arrow, given rise to the phrase, 'don't shoot the messenger'.
In 1745 an unknown ITK posted a parchment in the church noticeboard in the village of Upper Appleby that the villages best morris dancer, Josiah Felchalot had signed for local rivals Lower Appleby. In 1815, the Battle of Waterloo might have taken a different turn if Napoleon had not ignored ITK telling of British troop movements, claiming that the information was 'unverified'.
By the 20th century, ITK was advancing in leaps and bounds. During the Great War, pigeons were used to carry ITK and in fact it is said that a pigeon known as 'Speckled Bill' landed at the offices of the Stoke Evening Newspaper telling of the impending signing of Stanley Matthews. Sadly the Editor ignored it and lost a scoop, a mistake modern day editors are in no hurry to repeat, which is why they print absolutely everything.
The early 70's saw the emergence of possibly the greatest ITK of all time, a shadowy figure known only as 'Deepthroat', whose ITK was directly responsible for bringing about the Watergate scandal.
Today, ITK is concentrated more on football, with almost everyone having a nan at the airport, a friend who works in Hatton Garden or a cousin who works in the city. Info is passed through several hands and what might start as information saying Spurs are interested in Torres gets passed from one person, on to another and then another until it finally makes its way onto SC as 'Torres.....done deal'.
So remember, ITK has a long, chequered history and a very murky past. It has had some stunning successes, but for every success story there are many failures and today's ITK's are under the spotlight like never before. Cryptics, Typos, Misunderstandings................Where would we be if Richard IV's message contained a typo in latin? Worse, if Napoleon hadn't insisted on ignoring 'unverified' ITK? I tell you where........We'd be French and shooting messengers, now one isn't so bad but being French?
So to the ITK's out there I say this.......More spellchecker, less cryptics but either way, keep it coming. As the mrs said as she kneeled in the middle of a circle of 12 masturbating dwarves.
Have you donated this month? Then donate again!, every penny raised goes toward the server costs which allow us to bring you our unrivalled ITK coverage!
AND NOW A MESSAGE FROM OUR SPONSORS
SC relies on donations to keep going and we need your help so please make a donation now to help keep us going!
Please click on the Donate button which will take you to the Front Page. From there click on the Donate button again and you will be taken to our donation portal.