Let's All Laugh At... Let's all laugh at Chelsea thread

[nailsy]

The secret footballers take on things....

http://www.thesecretfootballer.com/...-still-stubborn-jose-mourinho-wont-back-down/

 

[michaelden]

Not really though. Doctors who sleep with their patients are rarely high fived, are they?

She's not a real hippocratic oath doctor.

At the age of 16, she was inspired to be a doctor in sport.[2] She studied medicine at the University of Nottingham, spent two years at the Australasian College of Sports Physicians in Melbourne and completed her MSc in Sport and Exercise at Queen Mary University of London.

 

[Geyzer Soze]

She's not a real hippocratic oath doctor.

I was wondering that. Is she a Physio or an actual doctor?

And does not banging your patients come under the oath? What if the only way to save a bird is to bang her. Connundrum.

 

[michaelden]

if you're a sports physio, you'll hardly dealing with the vulnerable in society so i don't believe there is any restriction on banging a client. same as a karate teacher, nothing wrong there, or your travel ag

 

[teok]

The whole Carneiro case has been pretty embarrassing to be honest. Like a bunch of horny 13 year old lads giggling behind the bike sheds.

 

[beats1]

if you're a sports physio, you'll hardly dealing with the vulnerable in society so i don't believe there is any restriction on banging a client. same as a karate teacher, nothing wrong there, or your travel ag

I agree but if you were banging a client you wouldn't take it to court as Chelsea will use any dirty laundry they can find as to why it isn't an unfair dismissal

 

[Misfit]

I agree but if you were banging a client you wouldn't take it to court as Chelsea will use an dirty laundry they can find as to why it isn't an unfair dismissal

Exactly, Fuck morality here. I'm sure many actual doc-docs bump uglies with patients and aren't in any way exploiting their patient but depending on the workplace certain rules exist. If her actions have contributed to her not being able to do her job properly - or the club can at least spin it that way - then that's what they'll go with. Having biblical knowledge of several players would certainly qualify.

So if these Razzle style tales of her boinking half the team have any truth to them they will quickly be made public.

Or they're bloody nonsense as football is about the last place that has any style or tact and our redtops just could not supress their natural urges to scream this from the highest point in the land. Injunctions be damned, they physically couldn't control themselves. If it is true, we'll know all the details soon enough. I remain sceptical.

 

[riggi]

Poor savage.

 

[ERO]

Savage had a massively better career than Jose Mourinho, so maybe that goes some way to explain how Jose has lost the dressing room then.

 

[Riandor]

I'm wondering if Jose's policy of defending/deflecting blame in the eyes of the public is backfiring on him a little here.

If the players are revolting, whether it be over the physio or his tactics, etc... Then they should be dropped and hung out to dry should they persist.

Player power has become borderline disgusting and if it wasn't for their value to a top club they would in any other line of profession be sacked.

If...

That being said, I'm not sure there is a player revolt, as I'm sure Mourinho would be OK dropping players to the bench, or worse. No, this reeks of a sudden onset of fear and uncertainty. A few bad results, maybe some complacency and some bad press and negative momentum builds.

We are witnessing the opposite for now and that's refreshing...

I dont mind what happens to that despicable club and it's mafia owner, but I'm with cosmic on this, I worry a tiny bit that Jose is not doing what's healthy for him right now. I appreciate he totally devides opinion and whilst I think he has been a great manager,his recent behaviour has not been what I would like to have seen. If he haD been clever, He would have taken the elder statesman route and basically replaced fergie as the EPL darling. But something has gone badly wrong somewhere.

Hope the club gets relegated. Won't happen, but would love it.

 

[tobi]

Michael Kelso would have been proud of that 'burn' by John Terry.

 

[thinktank]

Doesn't strike me as a team not playing for him....

 

[etchedchaos]

Doesn't strike me as a team not playing for him....

Roman probably put the fear of god in them about losing to a stinking Ukrainian side.

 

[Misfit]

I'm wondering if Jose's policy of defending/deflecting blame in the eyes of the public is backfiring on him a little here.

If the players are revolting, whether it be over the physio or his tactics, etc... Then they should be dropped and hung out to dry should they persist.

Player power has become borderline disgusting and if it wasn't for their value to a top club they would in any other line of profession be sacked.

If...

That being said, I'm not sure there is a player revolt, as I'm sure Mourinho would be OK dropping players to the bench, or worse. No, this reeks of a sudden onset of fear and uncertainty. A few bad results, maybe some complacency and some bad press and negative momentum builds.

We are witnessing the opposite for now and that's refreshing...

I dont mind what happens to that despicable club and it's mafia owner, but I'm with cosmic on this, I worry a tiny bit that Jose is not doing what's healthy for him right now. I appreciate he totally devides opinion and whilst I think he has been a great manager,his recent behaviour has not been what I would like to have seen. If he haD been clever, He would have taken the elder statesman route and basically replaced fergie as the EPL darling. But something has gone badly wrong somewhere.

Hope the club gets relegated. Won't happen, but would love it.

Chelsea players are always revolting. Boom-tish! I-ang-yow.

Meh, Jose does what he does. Fair fucks to him for his efforts with Porto in the CL but otherwise, wins leagues and cups with the 800 lbs gorilla in the league - and outside of Porto spends a fucking obscene amount of money initially and buys tippy top quality and then it goes to shit after the initial couple of seasons. Rinse and repeat. The guy has a record of collecting trophies that speaks for itself but in 50 years, his name won't be remembered as the great managers/coaches are. I honestly believe it. He's not a builder of a squad, he's a buyer. He doesn't adapt his system to maximise his players because, well, why fucking bother. Just get the owner to give you £150m-£300m to buy a ready made first XI to plug into the one and only system. And for all this vast spending and winning, the football served up is largely dull. The players signed guarantee spells of good football and goals but that isn't by design.

Shit, England is about the only country where he has some level of affection shown to him. He should kick back and relax. Go and take on Porto/Benfica/Sporting for a few years and then a semi-retirement as Portugal coach after CRon has retired. His shtick is really old now.

 

[Danners9]

I found John Terry's dismissal of Robbie Savage to be rather silly, even more so the giggles from the journalists. Tossers. Clearly Terry was a bit rattled - maybe even knows the criticism is justified - he should have just said he takes all criticism with a grain of salt, gets on with his game and everyone at the club knows they need to do better, not get into listing who he will take criticism from and who he won't. Savage is a WUM, everyone knows, even he knows, it's his job to be like that. He's allowed an opinion though, as we all are.

Seems Nick Miller from F365 (not from New Girl) thinks so, too: http://www.football365.com/news/terry-v-savage-mind-games-to-make-mourinho-proud

 

[Riandor]

Chelsea players are always revolting. Boom-tish! I-ang-yow.

Meh, Jose does what he does. Fair fucks to him for his efforts with Porto in the CL but otherwise, wins leagues and cups with the 800 lbs gorilla in the league - and outside of Porto spends a fucking obscene amount of money initially and buys tippy top quality and then it goes to shit after the initial couple of seasons. Rinse and repeat. The guy has a record of collecting trophies that speaks for itself but in 50 years, his name won't be remembered as the great managers/coaches are. I honestly believe it. He's not a builder of a squad, he's a buyer. He doesn't adapt his system to maximise his players because, well, why fucking bother. Just get the owner to give you £150m-£300m to buy a ready made first XI to plug into the one and only system. And for all this vast spending and winning, the football served up is largely dull. The players signed guarantee spells of good football and goals but that isn't by design.

Shit, England is about the only country where he has some level of affection shown to him. He should kick back and relax. Go and take on Porto/Benfica/Sporting for a few years and then a semi-retirement as Portugal coach after CRon has retired. His shtick is really old now.

I don't disagree with you, but isn't every coach at a top team a buyer by default, especially now.
If you're at Barcelona, Madrid, Chelsea, Man United, City, PSG and Bayer Munich... you buy right? That's not to say the odd youth product might not make it through, but by and large all the managers throw money at a problem and because their clubs are rich and the selling clubs know it, the amounts become obscene.

So Mourinho is not entirely to blame for the money spent, that's by and large due to the fact his owner is totally corrupt and has virtually infinite funds, so doesn't mind solving the problem with cash. That pretty much applies to Real Madrid as well, other than the fact that the Spanish Banks don't have as much cash as Abramovich.

 

[tototoner]

Had to laugh at this

http://www.standard.co.uk/news/lond...med-in-antiliverpool-rant-after-a3106751.html

 

[Misfit]

I don't disagree with you, but isn't every coach at a top team a buyer by default, especially now.
If you're at Barcelona, Madrid, Chelsea, Man United, City, PSG and Bayer Munich... you buy right? That's not to say the odd youth product might not make it through, but by and large all the managers throw money at a problem and because their clubs are rich and the selling clubs know it, the amounts become obscene.

So Mourinho is not entirely to blame for the money spent, that's by and large due to the fact his owner is totally corrupt and has virtually infinite funds, so doesn't mind solving the problem with cash. That pretty much applies to Real Madrid as well, other than the fact that the Spanish Banks don't have as much cash as Abramovich.

True enough. Maybe it's an unfair thing to expect in those circs and really what are all the greats remembered for? It's turning a club into a giant or putting them back there after a fall from grace and making them into a global force a la Fergie. Nobody has ever gone to a European goliath and improved them because, well, it's a bit difficult to do really considering the history etc.

Unfair it may be but it does mean its difficult to put Jose et al on a pedestal. Maybe if one of these new coaches sticks with a club for more than 5 minutes and builds several teams all winning trophies like a Fergie but otherwise, what route is there at a club that is already dining at the top table.

 

[Misfit]

I found John Terry's dismissal of Robbie Savage to be rather silly, even more so the giggles from the journalists. Tossers. Clearly Terry was a bit rattled - maybe even knows the criticism is justified - he should have just said he takes all criticism with a grain of salt, gets on with his game and everyone at the club knows they need to do better, not get into listing who he will take criticism from and who he won't. Savage is a WUM, everyone knows, even he knows, it's his job to be like that. He's allowed an opinion though, as we all are.

Seems Nick Miller from F365 (not from New Girl) thinks so, too: http://www.football365.com/news/terry-v-savage-mind-games-to-make-mourinho-proud

There’s going to be an introductory press conference in which the two combatants stand nose-to-nose, and one of them almost certainly thinks ‘What would happen if I kissed this bloke on the mouth, with tongues?’

 

[tiger666]