Defensive Comedy Awards 2013-2014

[haxman]

Naughton . That is all.

 

[XSuicideBunnyX]

This vote is looking like a close run thing.

My top 3 are:
Kaboul's beautiful Paulinho backheel flick... into his own net
Walker's assist from the halfway line to Demba Ba
Naughton's attempt to become a flying fish

 

[JollyHappy]

Has to be Chiriches. Everyone around me in the crowd was laughing and as it was a fairly meaningless match plus we won it was less costly. He managed to make 3 huge errors - one taking the throw in the first place, second not throwing it to a safe area and third the perfect pass across an unguarded goal.

 

[Gassin's finest]

Moral of the story here boys is that if you are under pressure it's safer and more productive making a forward pass rather than passing sideways or backward and putting the defence or keeper under more pressure

If in doubt...

 

[robin09]

Love this thread, if you don't laugh you'd cry.

I have to say, some of the mistakes we've made have been ruthlessly punished. Plenty of times teams make mistakes, but it seems almost all of our errors have resulted in goals.

Look at the City goal when Lloris kicked it to Negredo, he still had a lot of work to do and he hammered it top corner.

And Sunderland, if you watch the gif, Kaboul is blocking all but a 20cm gap inside the post, and Cattermole who's never scored a goal in his life, slides it in there from 30yds!

Also Vertonghen's slip that led to him passing it to Eto'o, he put it in the only spot that wasn't being blocked.

Chiriches against Sunderland for me, say what you like about it that was a perfectly weighted pass that cattermole was able to stroll onto without breaking stride, if only Lennon or Townsend could see a pass let alone play it like that we'd be on to something.

The Chiriches goal is the one for me too.

So you've got a terrible throw by Vlad, to Lloris that puts him under pressure. Instead of booting it out Hugo plays it back to Vlad. Then Vlad under more pressure, instead of booting it out, plays it across the area miles from Kaboul. He positions it so expertly that Cattermole reaches it in stride.
I don't think we've played a better attacking pass all season. Except for Vertonghen and Walker against Chelsea. now I think of it. Fuck we're bad.

 

[idontgetit]

If in doubt...

Genuinely though. I swear half of our defensive problems have been caused by unnecessary back passes, freekicks and throw in's hoshed up the fucking pitch because no-ones available, defenders not trusting midfielders with the ball etc etc.

It's the price we've paid for AVB picking athletes over footballers initially and then Sherwood playing a new arse about tit 'system' every week

 

[idontgetit]

Can the prize for the winner be that they get their very own Keyboard Cat video. It would be so good. Maybe with a few shots of Tim thrown in.


Please please please

 

[Bobbins]

We are properly shit :lol:

 

[XSuicideBunnyX]

Can the prize for the winner be that they get their very own Keyboard Cat video. It would be so good. Maybe with a few shots of Tim thrown in.


Please please please

I'd be more than willing to make it. And I've got Sony Vegas.

 

[CornerPinDreamer]

so defensive errors cost us at least, umm, 12 points this season?

..so far

 

[Klinsmannesque]

And to think, despite us making so many shit mistakes, so many woeful performances and generally having the worst season we've had in about 5 years...we're still only 6 points off 4th.

 

[Reece]

Where's the other 8......

 

[Sir Henry]

Our defence is such a comedy of errors at the moment I just went nuts and ticked them all lol

 

[Hoddle&Waddle]

This takes the Award for me...

 

[eddiev14]

Loads of defensive brain-farts there and some really strong contenders!

However, following last season's winner against Liverpool, Kyle Walker scoops the award with another display of fabulous stupidity.

That one against Chelsea is the worst. Seriously, it has to be.

I mean, what on earth is he doing trying to head a kick-out back in that direction? It didn't make sense then and I'm still trying to understand what his thought process was.

At least with Chiriches' mistake, I kinda understood what he was trying to do - he was given a hospital pass by Lloris and didn't want to just get rid.

With Walker's one though, it just... well, it's the winner, isn't it?

It sums up our season. Not enough thought before action.

 

[Hoddle&Waddle]

Has to be Chiriches. Everyone around me in the crowd was laughing and as it was a fairly meaningless match plus we won it was less costly. He managed to make 3 huge errors - one taking the throw in the first place, second not throwing it to a safe area and third the perfect pass across an unguarded goal.

To be fair to Vlad it was a poor pass played to him by Lloris, Lloris should have lumped it clear.

 

[mano-obe]

I voted Vertonghen and Chiriches. Vertonghen can be excused for slipping as that's not a mistake but the blind backpass, if I had done that in kids league 30 years ago i would have got an almighty bollocking.

Vlad's passing it across the face of the goal , which we were never allowed to do, with no goalie in the goal too, I would have been torn a new arsehole. We got taught that crap when I was 7 years old, even though it was a fun league we used to get told off bad enough to never do silly shite like that again

I bet there are a lot more errors this season than just these .gifs, what a great collection though

 

[XSuicideBunnyX]

I voted Vertonghen and Chiriches. Vertonghen can be excused for slipping as that's not a mistake but the blind backpass, if I had done that in kids league 30 years ago i would have got an almighty bollocking.

Vlad's passing it across the face of the goal , which we were never allowed to do, with no goalie in the goal too, I would have been torn a new arsehole. We got taught that crap when I was 7 years old, even though it was a fun league we used to get told off bad enough to never do silly shite like that again

I bet there are a lot more errors this season than just these .gifs, what a great collection though

SO true. These mistakes wouldn't happen in an under 10's game. For a start, Rose's dad would have screamed at him to bollock it away rather than try a Cryuff turn.

 

[Real_madyidd]

People saying that passing backwards applies pressure? Saying we should cross or pass forward? Are we a childrens team? Are we non league shit that cannnot control a ball? Or are we one of the top clubs in one of the top leagues?

Seriously our players shopuld not feel the pressure of a pass, if that worries them then they need getting rid of, now!

 

[faymantaray]

'Kinell this thread is depressing but I love that us Spurs fans can still laugh about it!