Let's All Laugh At... Let's all laugh at Liverpool thread

[Insomnia]

Poor Tim Burton hasn't aged well.

I'd look worse than that if I'd been fucking his wife all this time

 

[Ionman34]

this season we will be mostly signing...

Strikers

Brilliant!!!

 

[whitechina]

I'd look worse than that if I'd been fucking his wife all this time

I wouldn't mind looking like that if I could be with his wife for a night

 

[SpainSpur85]

Just to give their squad a bit more context...

I posted this a few pages back, but have added the year signed and fee paid.

Goalkeepers:
Mingolet, 2013, £9m
Bogdan, 2015, free

RB:
Clyne, 2015, £12.5m
Flanagan, youth
Wisdom, youth

CB:
Lovren, 2014, £20m
Skrtel, 2008, £6.5m
Sakho, 2013, £18m
Toure, 2013, free

LB:
Enrique, 2011, £7m
Moreno, 2014, £12m

CM:
Henderson, 2011, £20m
Milner, 2015, free
Lucas, 2007, free
Can, 2014, £9.75m
Allen, 2012, £15m

AM:
Lallana, 2014, £25m
Coutinho, 2012, £8.5m
Markovic, 2014, £20m
Ibe, youth

FW:
Firmino, 2015, £29m
Sturridge, 2013, £12m
Benteke, 2015, £32.5m
Ings, 2015, £???
Balotelli, 2014, £16m
Lambert, 2014, £4m
Borini, 2012, £10.5m
Origi, 2014, £10m


So much of that squad is new, 14 of those players have been bought in the last year. And nearly all of them have been significant transfer fees. It's mental.

Let's play a new game.

If you're Rodgers what's your starting 11?

I'll play your game, I have a sneaky feeling Rodgers will play some funky 3-2-3-2 formation, but I'm not.

Mignolet (is better than the Wotsit, just about)

Clyne (has to start)
Skrtel (if he's not fouling they might start conceding at corners)
Toure (probably still better than Lovren)
Moreno (isn't there some sort of problem with Enrique who I rate higher?)

Henderson (he's captain right?)
Milner (I'm assuming he went for game time)
Can (isn't a CB but is pretty good further forward)

Firmino (not sure if he can play from the right)
Benteke (will start when Sturridge isn't fit, 32.5m isn't for a sub)
Coutinho (has to start surely?)

Then on the bench there'd be Bogdan, Lovren/Sahko, Lucas/Allen, Markovic/Ibe, Ings then there's 2 spaces left, God only knows who gets them.

It's not a bad team, but look who doesn't make the squad. Good luck keeping those happy. Surely there'll be more signings too, some more defenders must be bought. Obviously some will be sold, but they're already about 30 million in the red, the players sold won't cover that and the new defenders they need. There's 6 new players and probably 1 or 2 more, 7 or 8 signings for a season is too many. As we and they know! It's a huge risk to go into a big season with an unbalanced squad especially after spending 60+ on forwards and only 12 on defenders when you need defenders.

 

[DJS]

I'll play your game, I have a sneaky feeling Rodgers will play some funky 3-2-3-2 formation, but I'm not.

Mignolet (is better than the Wotsit, just about)

Clyne (has to start)
Skrtel (if he's not fouling they might start conceding at corners)
Toure (probably still better than Lovren)
Moreno (isn't there some sort of problem with Enrique who I rate higher?)

Henderson (he's captain right?)
Milner (I'm assuming he went for game time)
Can (isn't a CB but is pretty good further forward)

Firmino (not sure if he can play from the right)
Benteke (will start when Sturridge isn't fit, 32.5m isn't for a sub)
Coutinho (has to start surely?)

Then on the bench there'd be Bogdan, Lovren/Sahko, Lucas/Allen, Markovic/Ibe, Ings then there's 2 spaces left, God only knows who gets them.

It's not a bad team, but look who doesn't make the squad. Good luck keeping those happy. Surely there'll be more signings too, some more defenders must be bought. Obviously some will be sold, but they're already about 30 million in the red, the players sold won't cover that and the new defenders they need. There's 6 new players and probably 1 or 2 more, 7 or 8 signings for a season is too many. As we and they know! It's a huge risk to go into a big season with an unbalanced squad especially after spending 60+ on forwards and only 12 on defenders when you need defenders.

Yeah I'm not sure what the problem with Enrique is, he was injured but thought he's back to fitness now and a pretty tasty left back (not saying Moreno isn't but doesn't seem like they're competing fairly at mo).

Can they were saying on Liverpool forum where they were melting down after Wigan defeat is decent in midfield rather than makeshift right back.

Rodgers does seem to buy and discard players though, look at how he's managed to buy and waste Lovrens and Lallana.

 

[spursfan77]

Yeah I'm not sure what the problem with Enrique is, he was injured but thought he's back to fitness now and a pretty tasty left back (not saying Moreno isn't but doesn't seem like they're competing fairly at mo).

Can they were saying on Liverpool forum where they were melting down after Wigan defeat is decent in midfield rather than makeshift right back.

Rodgers does seem to buy and discard players though, look at how he's managed to buy and waste Lovrens and Lallana.

I think we should chuck a cheeky £10 million bid at them for lallana. He's not going to get in the side and is going to get fed up with sitting on the bench this season. I think he could be worth a try in January.

 

[Marty]

I think we should chuck a cheeky £10 million bid at them for lallana. He's not going to get in the side and is going to get fed up with sitting on the bench this season. I think he could be worth a try in January.

The phrase "cheeky bid" should result in a perma ban.

But I kind of agree that he'd be worth a try. Can't see Livepool being willing to sell to us though.

 

[ERO]

The phrase "cheeky bid" should result in a perma ban.

You should have a cheeky nandos. You're not you when you're hungry.

 

[Flynn]

Love to know what Liverpools wage bill looks like compared to our now. I know they freed up >200k a week when Gerrard left but they'd piled it back on.

They don't seem to be having any luck shifting their players either. Everyone will be low balling them knowing they've got a stacked squad.

 

[rossdapep]

Love to know what Liverpools wage bill looks like compared to our now. I know they freed up >200k a week when Gerrard left but they'd piled it back on.

They don't seem to be having any luck shifting their players either. Everyone will be low balling them knowing they've got a stacked squad.

Yep. They'll certainly be calling clubs at the 11th hour trying desperately to offload them. They are going to have lots of unrest in that squad. Let's say sturridge is fit and scoring, benteke doesn't get off to a good start. Are they going to have a 32m signing sat on the bench feeling content. Vice versa. And you can say it for a lot of their squad.

 

[Wellspurs]

Apparently Rodgers missus is after half his assets now they have split up. He owns a staggering 102 houses! You'd have thought he would have converted some to hotels by now?

 

[Frozen_Waffles]

Just crazyness.... what must Origi be thinking, signed for 10m kept on loan for a season and will not get a game.

That defence is rank average and those attacking players just dont match. Benteke thrives on balls from wide areas, yet they only have 1 winger and he is still just potential. He also has played up front on his own for the last few years. So it is unlikely he will get a partner.

I just dont get it

 

[nightgoat]

Just crazyness.... what must Origi be thinking, signed for 10m kept on loan for a season and will not get a game.

That defence is rank average and those attacking players just dont match. Benteke thrives on balls from wide areas, yet they only have 1 winger and he is still just potential. He also has played up front on his own for the last few years. So it is unlikely he will get a partner.

I just dont get it

That's a classic Chelsea-esque 'buy him so no one else can' transfer if ever there was one.

 

[YidNick]

Shadab Monjur ‏@Liverpool_World Dec 17
Sterling is becoming like the next C.ronaldo. A winger with full potential to play as a striker.

Shadab Monjur ‏@Liverpool_World Apr 30
Sterling doesnt cut in. He takes the ball. Goes wide. Shows some foot works. Then lose it. Similar player is Johnson. Sterling's just better

Shadab Monjur ‏@Liverpool_World May 2
Sterling's shite

Shadab Monjur ‏@Liverpool_World May 21
Suarez & Sterling are different thing. Sterling is nowhere good to start in our XI on regular basis. He's over rated now.

 

[Insomnia]

 

[Gbspurs]

I actually think Sterling will really kick on in that City team. I know many don't rate him but I think he has the potential to be whatever he wants. City lack something wide and he will make a huge difference.

 

[dontcallme]

I actually think Sterling will really kick on in that City team. I know many don't rate him but I think he has the potential to be whatever he wants. City lack something wide and he will make a huge difference.

I agree. I can see City playing a front three of Sterling, Silva and Ageuro.

Some people think he's signed for the money and will simply be on the bench, I disagree.

 

[ilikeost]

I agree. I can see City playing a front three of Sterling, Silva and Ageuro.

Some people think he's signed for the money and will simply be on the bench, I disagree.

Some people = Liverpool supporters.

 

[dontcallme]

Some people = Liverpool supporters.

I'd love to agree but there are plenty of people here who thinks he will just sit on the bench at City.

 

[SambaSpurs]

I'd love to agree but there are plenty of people here who thinks he will just sit on the bench at City.

Well those people are idiots, he's their record signing at £49mil, he will be starting unless he has an absolute stinker for half a season. He's a top player and can see him getting a fair few goals this year as well as laying on a load of assists for Aguero.